My sister works on an organic free range buffalo farm. I mean, BISON. They also sell turkeys. Last weekend I went to see her at the farmer's market and there was a sign that said "let's talk turkey about turkey!" but when I tried, she told me "that's not how turkeys talk."
Which seems like a poor sales strategy to me. What happened to "the customer is always right"?
I guess I wasn't actually a customer. "CECILY is always right", that's how it's supposed to go.
***
Last year for Thanksgiving I had pizza. It wasn't even good pizza, it was frozen pizza from the gas station down the corner. We also had mashed potatoes and gravy, and some other more traditional fare. Then we felt embarrassed about our lack of holiday spirit so we made a pact to always refer to the pizza as "turkey."
"Would you like another slice of turkey?"
"This turkey is delicious!"
"Do we have any more pepperoni turkey?"
etc.
This year I hope to be eating actual turkey. Courtesy of my sister's boyfriend's brother's wife's cousin's father's sister's friend's coworker's son.
Just kidding. Actually it is my sister's boyfriend's brother, that's all. I'm going to their house to eat turkey and drink wine, and then my sister and her boyfriend and I are coming back to my house to sleep it off.
Mmmm. turkey.
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